AVERAGE EMPLOYEE:
Not too bright.

EXCEPTIONALLY WELL QUALIFIED:
Made no major blunders – yet.

ACTIVE SOCIALLY:
Drinks a lot.

FAMILY IS ACTIVE SOCIALLY:
Spouse drinks, too.

CHARACTER ABOVE REPROACH:
Still one step ahead of the cops.

ZEALOUS ATTITUDE:
Opinionated.

QUICK THINKING:
Offers plausible excuses for mistakes.

CAREFUL THINKER:
Won’t make a decision.

TAKES PRIDE IN WORK:
Conceited.

PLANS FOR ADVANCEMENT:
Buys drinks for all the boys in the office at happy hour.

FORCEFUL:
Argumentative.

AGGRESSIVE:
Obnoxious.

USES LOGIC ON DIFFICULT JOBS:
Gets someone else to do it.

A KEEN ANALYST:
Thoroughly confused.

EXPRESS THEMSELVES WELL:
Speak English.

CONSCIENTIOUS:
Scared.

METICULOUS ATTENTION TO DETAIL:
A nit picker.

HAS LEADERSHIP QUALITIES:
Is tall or has a loud voice.

EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD JUDGMENT:
Lucky.

KEEN SENSE OF HUMOR:
Knows a lot of dirty jokes.

STRONG PRINCIPLES:
Stubborn.

CAREER MINDED:
Back Stabber.

COMING ALONG WELL:
About to be let go.

OF GREAT VALUE TO THE ORGANIZATION:
Gets to work on time.

RELAXED ATTITUDE:
Sleeps at desk.

EXPERIENCED PROBLEM SOLVER:
Screws up often.

WORK IS FIRST PRIORITY:
Too ugly to get a date.

INDEPENDENT WORKER:
Nobody knows what he/she does all day.

FORWARD THINKING:
Procrastinator.

GREAT PRESENTATION SKILLS:
Able to BS well.

GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS:
Spends lots of time on phone.

LOYAL:
Can’t get a job anywhere else.

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